Sobering.
Two pieces of news from a single phone call just now.
My mother’s estate has finally been settled. I’ll be receiving a check for a little more than $82,000 this weekend. Damn, I didn’t want this money. I wanted her to spend it on herself. She refused to touch the principle on any of her accounts. Wanted it to be a nest egg for her “chicks”. She did without, lived frugally until Alzheimer’s robbed her of being able to take any enjoyment from life. I almost feel like this is blood money, gained only through her misery. I’d give up every last goddamned penny of it if it could have given her back her mind and some happiness in the last years of her life.
My older sister called to let me know that she pushed to get the estate settled because my younger sister and her husband have just decided to divorce. My younger sister is afraid of losing the house, and needs this money to buy out her husband’s share of it. Married ten or so years, no kids. The biggest problem is going to be who keeps the rabbits, which are treated like children. I knew things were bad for them, and I’m not surprised at the decision, just the timing. The biggest problem was that he was away for weeks/months at a time for work, and that caused friction. He just got a desk job that would have dramatically cut back the travel. I begin to just now realize that perhaps it wasn’t the travel that was hurting the marriage, but the time he spent home.
For some reason, I feel an overwhelming need to go home and be hugged for a while.
I saw that and took it…then I realised after looking at it that there werent any non disordered persoanlities in the list…lol
I was Shizoid…too true
I was so intrigued, had to take the test myself! Anyway, I’m glad to hear the dishes were done this morning! Horay! It sounds like your trip to Boston might do you both some good, a little time apart, you know, to make him realize what he has! Hopefully when you get back there will be clean dishes! 🙂
As for coloring your hair… why not try it with a temporary color the first time in case you don’t like it. That way, it’ll gradually wash out. Clairol Loving Care is pretty good. Good luck!
Is there a whacked rating on that test?
My husband colors his hair at home it would be all grey otherwise. Be careful because it really makes a mess.
I don’t want my parents doing without either. I totally understand your feelings. But she did it,,,and it was important to her. To her this represented something special. Her sacrifice was her way of showing her love one last time. Take it as a wonderful gift of love from her.
Jami
Don’t feel guilty about money from your mom’s estate. She lived the way she did because she wanted to, no one was forcing her to be frugal.
Use the money for something that will make you happy. Travel, classes, moving? and thank your mom in your mind often while you enjoy what you’re doing.
I understand what a strange feeling it must be to receive that kind of money from a parent’s estate. I have a friend who received a bunch from her parents and she felt just like you, not wanting the money, wishes they’d spent it to enjoy their own lives. I’ll tell you the same thing I tell her – they wanted you to have it. Be grateful and use it wisely.
*hugs* have a good weekend.
That’s rough Salamander. Your best bet in this situation is to not squander the money. Keep in mind how important it was to your mother for you to have it. Try not to conentrate on what could have been, but on what is.
As for your hair…do what *you* want. Salamander, you need to try and just do something that makes *you* happy, and forget what everyone else may think.
Glad to hear about the dishes.