Exoneration lost its eraser
Long time, no write. Indeed, long time no write, no read, no internet involvement worth speaking of. The result is something between a hiatus and a lifestyle change.
Iâve wasted way too much time just trying to decide what an appropriate analogy would be to me posting this. Is it like surfacing for air after a long dive? Or is it more like taking a deep breath and diving after lounging on a raft in the sun? Thatâs the problem with analogies: under scrutiny they seldom remain analogous.
It isnât that I havenât tried to get back into some form of virtual interaction. For many years virtually the only social interaction I engaged in was virtual. But the old paths have grown over and the old haunts are either tangled with weeds or have been urbanized. My sorties into unexplored territory have been disappointing. So Iâve taken up new pursuits, most of which involve a television or a book and reading glasses.
While the magnification of the aforementioned reading glasses could probably be tweaked up a few percent, the remaining gauges of my progressing mortality remain remarkably static. That episode of liver rejection last year passed without doing any lasting damage, other than leaving me with a constantly changing PT/INR that needs to be tested weekly. The CTCL remains suppressed by the now-monthly PUVA. My BP is up (it read 200/95 at my cardiologist visit), which reminds me … I’ve now added “cardiologist” to my accumulation of professional consultants. This brings the number of licensed medical professionals who have an active file with my name on it up to eight, although I probably shouldn’t count the osteopath since we’ve discovered I really do have a sacrum after all. At this point all we need to do pour some milk on it and my medical history doubles as a bowl of Alpha-bits.
On a less narcissistic bent, the four girl-cats have gotten older. The passing months have been least kind to the Warrior Princess, who rather abruptly started showing her age this winter. Severe arthritis in her front legs has hobbled her activities. She turns out to be remarkably easy to pill, a fact for which I now find myself grateful on a bi-daily basis. The Little Grey Beast, ten years the junior to WP, has developed a small medical issue as well (cholecystitis), which is controlled by medication. There are days I feel like I’ve opened a small animal clinic. The medication schedules aren’t all that bad, but my own aging grey matter requires that I post a check-off chart on the refrigerator so I can keep track of who gets what pill when. The Professor helps when he can, but WP nailed his finger a month or so ago when he was trying to pill her; he is now usually happy to leave the application of medicinal chemicals in my hands. In his defense, The Prof’s fingers are substantially larger than mine, making pilling small cats a more challenging chore for him than for me.
There isn’t much more to update. Work remains odious, with worse descriptions that I could apply but choose not to get into. I’ve discarded any delusions I ever had about making a difference large or small in the lives of many or few. This more realistic approach to getting a paycheck doesn’t make the disillusionment in my career any easier to cope with, but it has evened out the manic-depressive swings of optimism/despair to a more steady-state of depression. I’ve read that we become our own worst enemies. I’m not sure that’s entirely accurate. Rather than becoming our own worst enemies, I suspect that we always are our own worst enemies. We just take our sweet old time figuring that out.
And so, an entry. I throw it out into the void, just because. There will be another entry. Someday. Probably. But while I was off-line, changing, the virtual world was on-line, changing. Change seldom forgives those who it passes by.
Well, hello….
Glad to hear from you.
I am medicating our latest foster Sheltie and had fond memories of getting pills down my boys when they were sick. Crushing pills and mixing them with a spoon of jam was the favored method then. I don’t think that will work so well with our very low (didn’t even register on the test) thyroid girl right now…
😉
Glad to see you make an update. I’d been wondering and worrying about you!
Our elderly pets continue to truck on and out number the younger set 3 to 1. Dusty, at 12 has no real medical concerns, nor does Romeo at 10. Chance at a little over 9 has cataracts and mild CHF *sigh*. Maggie, after having survived The Great Chicken Incident, is her usual happy-go lucky self. I’m sure you really wanted to know all that *laffs*
Take care of yourself!
yep. we’re all still where we are. glad to hear you’re doing okay. your updates are a gift.
I’ve been thinking of you a lot lately, having returned to the site where I met you. BTW, the nick you always wanted is available now. I tried it on when they revamped the site a couple of years ago, but it didn’t really fit me so I’m back to my old moniker.
Too bad you don’t have dogs to pill instead. Our Dog is so easy: Put it in a blob of peanut butter, and it’s gone. Tech Man has started giving him allergy shots, though, which I could tell was difficult for him in the beginning. His hands are steadier than mine, though, or else he’s being chivalrous: I haven’t had to try yet. LOL: Everyone’s telling you how their pets are!
I’m glad to hear you’re doing so well, and it’s good to hear from you again. *hug*
How funny you should post an entry today…I have been planning the same thing! I am going to renew my Plus account too…
Good hearing from you. With Shah on 3 medications two times daily I hear you. Lucky for us he enjoys applesauce.
Miss you too. I too haven’t been online much…just no time.
As stated above, it is, truly, a gift when you write. You write so beautifully and I truly miss being able to read about you on a regular basis.
I was very glad to read that your health situation is fairly stable. I have worried about that. And I’m sorry to read about WP’s arthritis and Gray Menace’s issues.
My own little gray menace, Kitten, is perfectly healthy, if a little fatter because she’s getting more treats and goodies. This has happened because I no longer have the underweight Labrador to feed treats to all day long.
I had to have Lucky euthanized in August after he lost bowel control, bladder control, and the ability to control his hind legs. I didn’t mind cleaning up after him, but when taken into account with his blindness and deafness, he just couldn’t have been getting much out of life– besides tasty treats. He didn’t even enjoy swimming anymore. It was time, but I still miss him horribly.
I don’t have a dog now because I can’t afford to be a responsible dog owner. I couldn’t even get out of the vet’s office for euthanasia for under $100. Cats are much cheaper.
So glad to see you back with us if only for a single entry. I have always enjoyed your writing and the stories you tell. My two girls are getting older and fatter as well, both seem to be in good health although the smaller one seems to have allergies. Have a wonderful day and I hope you post again soon.
I was thinking about you just the other day. We’ve been travelling in some of the most beautiful parts of the country, and you came into my mind. I was thinking how beautifully you’d write about what I was seeing.
And now,like magic, you reappear. Wonderful.
Alas, we all get older; cats at a much faster pace. It sounds as if the Princess has mellowed somewhat.
hi,so good to stop by your diary and see you have made a recent entry. i enjoyed catching up with you. take care and enjoy.
k
Yay! You’re back! I don’t have a lot to say other than I’ve missed you and wondered about you and am so glad you have resurfaced.