The Great Angel Food Cake Disaster of 2010

or
Why I Should Never Be Allowed Near a Kitchen

It’s not my fault. I never cooked one of these things before. I found out Thursday night that I had been assigned the task of bringing dessert to my younger sister’s birthday celebration Saturday. It was strongly suggested I bring angel food cake, fresh fruit and Cool Whip.

I’d never made an angel food cake before, but I remember my mother used to say that angel food cake was the one cake that wasn’t worth making from scratch because the mixes were just as good as homemade for a lot less trouble. I went out and bought a box of Betty. The back of the box said if you were using a loaf pan it had to be at least 10″ by 4″. I bought one slightly larger.

In a totally separate place on the box, in very small print, it said to pour the batter into two loaf pans. I didn’t read that.

The Prof and I are working our way through this fiasco of a cake – it looks mutant but doesn’t taste half-bad.

From this little adventure I discovered what a pain it is to remove angel food cake from its pan. I still had to make an angel food for Saturday, so I went out again, bought another box of Betty Crocker, and then set out on a search for an appropriate pan.

My new plan was to purchase a spring form pan meeting that afore-mentioned size criterion. After four stores’ worth of searching (the grocery store, Home Goods, Target and Bed, Bath and Beyond*) I began to realize that spring form pans are pretty much all about 2″ deep. While wandering about the last store in dismay I stumbled across something called an “Angel Food Cake Pan.” Who knew such a creature existed? (Obviously not moi.) The problem? The only one in the store was 9″ across, not the prerequisite 10″.

I went home, mixed up the batter, dumped most of it into my new cake pan (I wasn’t about to repeat the mistakes of the previous evening by putting all the batter into a pan smaller than specs called for), and stuck the thing in the oven. I figured I’d reward myself for all my hard work by having the remaining 3/4 cup of batter as a treat with some coffee.

The cake turned out fine, but allow me to share this final learning experience with you: Angel food cake batter is gross. The stuff was obviously never intended to be eaten raw.

* I freaking hate that store’s name. I feel like a total wuss every time I’m forced to say it or write it. “Bed, Bath and Beyond!” It sounds like something Buzz Lightyear’s wife would holler while launching herself into the bathroom.

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5 Comments

  1. Bed Bath And BE YOND!!!!!!!

    You are absolutely right. That is a Buzz Lightyear line if ever I heard one.

    Sorry about your mutant cake..

    Though angel food cake usually tastes good no matter what mutant form it takes in the baking process. Thank goodness.

  2. You are certainly a braver woman than I. My mother used to make them from scratch and I still have her angel food pan somewhere but the idea of actually making one, even from a box, fills me with terror.

  3. I actually dared to make not one but two angel food cakes in my teenage years. They came out fine, except that when I removed one from the angel food cake pan (yes, Mom had one of those), the cake was still pretty hot and broke the cake plate I put it on. :o/

    One of the two times I spead it with Cool Whip with fruit cocktail scattered over it. (I think I cut the cake in half so there were two layers, with some of the Cool Whip and fruit in the middle.) The other time with was Cool Whip with broken peppermint pieces. Both were incredibly good, and I say this as someone who usually thinks any dessert that doesn’t include chocolate isn’t worth the calories.

    Funny, I was just thinking a week or so ago that I’d like to make one, but we don’t have the pan.

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